The Jesus Hilario Show
I’m Jesus Hernandez, sharing real thoughts on faith, life, and personal growth. Each episode is a reflection from the heart — honest, unfiltered, and grounded in perspective. Whether it’s about culture, relationships, or spiritual insight, my goal is to spark thought and inspire truth.
The Jesus Hilario Show
EP132 | Embracing the Unboxable: Neurodiversity, Marketable Trades, and Being Salt and Light
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In this episode, I open up about the daily reality of being "unboxable"—living with ADD/ADHD and navigating a society that constantly tries to box you in through social policing. I share the internal conflict between wanting to be social and protecting my limited energy, and how I finally found my happy medium through hosting the Corpus Christi Originals podcast. I dive into how growing up "weird" can be isolating, but also how it forced me to spend hours alone mastering the guitar, playing Nintendo, and developing creative tools that I now get to share with the world.
I also offer practical advice for my fellow neurodivergent community on navigating the workplace. I talk about the absolute necessity of finding a highly marketable trade—like truck driving, plumbing, or electrical work—so that if you don't jive with a specific corporate culture, you always have the freedom to take your skills elsewhere. Grounded in my faith, I reflect on my accomplishments as a husband, father, college graduate, and professional driver to serve as a testimony and a reminder that we are called to be the salt and light of the earth.
Chapters- (00:00:00) - Having ADD Adhd, I Want to Be Social but
- (00:08:26) - Autistic Comedian on Social Policing
- (00:17:05) - Addison's ADHD and Neurodiversity: How to Work
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I'm starting to notice that I'm not easily categorized by people. Excuse me. And it's uncomfortable for them. And before and even now every now and then it creeps in my head like I want them to be comfortable. Because I wanna because I'm a part of society and I want to be liked by people, right? We've l if you live like that for a long time, I live like that for a long time, eventually it gets to the point where I decided for myself to not please those people. Because for me, a person of being a person of having ADD, ADHD, it's difficult to maintain or have relationships with people. Because I'm socially awkward, I don't get social cues, and I can be excommunicated or like excluded from social situations, excluded from parties, excluded from these things, from being invited out simply because I don't I'm I'm just weird. I I some I I remember I would say things out loud, I would laugh out loud, like literally laugh loudly, to where people would be like, oh, you're laughing too loud. And you know, and I just I'm living life cool thinking that it's just normal to be like that, you know. Um and you know, thank thanks to my parents and you know my father and my stepmother for just letting me be me. Uh and I'd say I've lost a lot of or lost a lot of opportunities with being hanging out with friends and stuff like that. And yeah, I mean it's still hap- I think it still happens to this day where I'm just it's just it's isolating, but at the but in a sense, it's okay. For me, I've learned in being isolated to entertain myself. Learn how to podcast. When I was younger, I learned how to play the guitar. It was a lot of hours spent by myself. Play games. Nintendo, I used to play Nintendo. I'm 40 years old. So it's kind of like a double-edged sword, like you'll learn stuff on your own, and eventually you want to take the that stuff, your creativity, and show it to the world, show it to people, and that means you that means that we have to, that I have to go out in public. And I wouldn't say that I'm a I've I've I've been afraid of going out in public or or have not wanted to go out in public because people are there, but at the same time, I don't want to go out in public because people are there. So, and that's always the constant thing for people with ADD. Like there's there's always positive and a negative charge that are that are fighting against each other. The reason why I say that, I I don't want to be around people, but I do want to be around people because I like to be social, I like to talk to people, I like to make people laugh, and mix that with not wanting to be around the people that are rude to me because I'm a certain way. Like, you know that I'm a certain way from a mile away. You can see it. And I see that in people, they see it for me from a mile away, and so like if I see people in public, I automatically look at them, at their face, to let them know like I'm not one to be bullied, right? Because we get bullied with people, people with ADD, ADHD, we get bullied from elementary school all the way to high school, and a lot of times we'll get bullied and we won't even know that we're being bullied or made fun of until later on after the fact. So though, so those two I want to be social, but I don't want to be social, are always fighting against each other. And I think I found the happy medium with podcasting uh in my other podcast, the Corpus Christi Originals podcast, because I get to talk to people, I get to talk to people for an hour, and then after that, I'm done. Yeah, that's all my social battery can stand. I'm gonna go back home to my kids, my family, and not be social until the next hour, next week. Uh but nah, I'm so I'm also social at and at work a lot of times because I kind of have to be, because I can't totally like close off everybody, especially in the workplace. In the workplace, I have to communicate. I gotta learn how to communicate, I gotta learn how to set boundaries too. Like we I've I've learned how to set boundaries in the workplace because there's bullying in the workplace, dude. It's it's everywhere. Um so find that happy medium because we still have to be a part of society, regardless. Uh and being a being a person that that believes that's a that believes in God through Jesus Christ according to the Bible. I don't I because that I know and I understand that God created me like this. Uh it makes you think of that story where they ask Jesus, this man has been like this, like I think he's paralyzed, or I don't know what happened to the guy. But they ask him, is it his fault or is it his parents' fault? You know? And I think obviously Jesus' answer, like always, is always like mind-boggling, like, what? Like we never would have thought of it like that. So I think that way about my particular situation and being the way that I am, uh, and it's like God wants me to be like this, so there's a way to live like this, and you know, it makes me think of people that are really like like paraplegic or have missing legs or are severely autistic or severely um disabled in certain ways, people that can't see, like, imagine what those people have to, and that's what I'm thinking in my mind. Like, imagine what those people have to live with, and and mine is just like, and I have a fully functioning body, thank you, Lord. As far as having arms, legs, I can see, I can hear, my vision is excellent. I just took a vision test, and it's and and for me, it's my brain that's that's messed up. And I'm thinking like people that can't see, people that can't hear, that have a missing arm or missing leg, whatever, whatever. For me, it's it's a a mental thing that I'm having to learn to live with. Um, and I have to constantly remind myself it's fine. It's the that's how your brain is. Learn to live with it, learn to navigate your life, and thinking about it now, I feel like I'm pretty successful in what I do. I'm married, you know what I mean? People used to make fun of me because they thought I was a certain way, and I'm married, I have kids, you know what I mean? I have a college degree. Uh I've I've I have a job, I'm able to provide for my family. I have a uh semi-successful local podcast in Corpus Christi, Texas. I had a semi-successful YouTube channel uh where I would put in guitar videos, I was putting programming videos, a lot of people watched, changed a lot of people's lives or helped a lot helped a lot of people. And like I think that's one of the things that I need to do for myself now is to reflect and think back like of all the things of all the accomplishments that I've made up until this point. Um then another topic too. I'm thinking about the people that may see me and and be like, oh wow, he's like me, and he's do he has these accomplishments. You know what I mean? Like, it's like the like the Bible wants us to be salt and light of the earth. You know, salt loses its flavor. I want to associate it with those that scripture because somebody that's in my predicament or has been or is dealing with life the way I am can look at my life and be like, oh wow, he's got ADD, he's ADHD, he's no neurodiverse, he's kind of autistic, he's got a local podcast, what he's a truck driver, what he plays guitar, what he's got a college degree, what he's married, he has kids, what I can do that too. Um so it's like part of my sharing this information too is just being salt and light of those for one that don't think that people like me can do it, and mainly for the people that think that are like me that may think that they can't do it, do the thing these things. It's particularly for them. And then maybe I don't know who knows, maybe my kids watch these videos later on and think back like, oh, this is how dad was it could be a testimony for them, you know. Um but yeah, it's it's it's encouraging to know that there's that people like me, people like myself can get along in in life and still have be successful. Um then too people from the outside looking in. I started this video out talking about how people it's not easy to be to categorize me because and along those lines I've got different interests. I'm not just the podcaster, I'm not just that. I've got other facets and things that I like. I'm I I just started stand-up comedy. You know, uh I I listen to music. I don't just listen to heavy music, I listen to hip hop music. Uh, you know, I get down with that type of stuff. And for some people, if they're just heavy music people, and I've noticed this throughout my life, some of them don't accept you as a heavy music person, even though you listen to heavy music. You know what I mean? Or some people won't accept you as a podcaster because whatever the reason is, because I'm me, you know, and it makes I think it makes uh those types of people nervous around me because they're used to categorizing people and being able to put them in a box and like oh you're over here and you're supposed to stay there, and people will will act that out. It's called social policing. They'll try to be like, nope, you have to be in this box, and me all most of my life, I'm like, no, I don't want to be in that box, I want to do this, you know what I mean? Uh or this, I want to do this. Who are you to say that I'm only supposed to do this? Only supposed to, in music's case, I'm only supposed to listen to heavy music and I'm not allowed to listen to hip hop music or country or whatever. Um that it's it's been it's it it's weird because it's not me. Like it I want to be who I am, and when I choose to be who I am, and I get in particular social circles in in any facet, say it's stand-up comedy, or say it's in the the podcast space, or in the music space, if I get in any one of those scenes, the ones that are only specific to that scene will will, I feel like they'll be nervous and they'll try to social police me or try to so that they can feel comfortable. And it's it's hard to explain, but they do it so that they can be comfortable with themselves. Me, an outsider coming in that has a podcast going into the music scene. Some of them will look at me and be like, What are you doing here? You're a podcaster. Uh we don't do that here, whatever, you know. And I've always been like, so what to those people? Because they're not the only ones in the scene. There are other people that might be like me in the scene, which I do get along with, and we have to find those people. Because not everybody's gonna try to police us, social police us, and not everybody's gonna try to put us in a box. Uh, and I want to say us, I mean people that are neurodiverse, like a bit autistic, a bit OCD, a bit everything that's on that type of neurodiverse spectrum, a bit autistic, all this other stuff. Um, so it's possible, and one of the ways to make make that work for myself or for people like myself, find people that are comp that are that are like me. And there are people that are not particularly neurodiverse or neurotypical that may have grown up with somebody like us or have a family member, somebody like us, and will show grace to us. And they'll I find those people super awesome because it's like this. My my wife gave me this one example. She's like, it's like those girls in high school. They would see another girl that's say autistic or ADD that's getting picked on, and they'll come to that girl's aid. The the normal neurotypical girls will go and fight for her, like being like, What why are you picking on this girl for whatever? And then they'll end up befriending the girl, the neurotypicals will end up uh befriending you know the ADHD person because they see that that they're being picked on, maybe because they have they've had a family member, they've had uh somebody like that, and so they they want to be on their side because they understand what they're going through. So the neurotypical people, mad props to them for giving us that type of grace, you know, wanting to fight for us. Uh and they're out there, you know. And I I like I'm thinking of this one guy particular at work who is is like that, and he's he's willing to be like, okay, this guy's like this, let's give him a shot, you know what I mean? And there's a lot of that in the workplace, especially for being ADD, ADHD, that people then don't want to give you a shot because you're just weird, because I'm just weird. Like I've been to a job before where I didn't fit the norm. They wanted to social police me. They wanted to be a certain me to be a certain way. And I just it's I it's it's hard for me to try to do that because when I try to do that, I put myself aside and I become in become somebody that I don't want to be. And and just being myself and like questioning, like a lot of times I question like, well, why is it like this? How come we can't do it like this? Whatever, whatever. Anyways, so there's there are workplaces that don't that won't give you a chance. And they'll just be like, Well, you know, we're not gonna give this guy just there we go. We're just we're gonna kick him out, we're gonna fire him, we're gonna get, you know, whatever. Um, and they'll do that. People businesses will do that, and then sometimes you'll land on this, like for sometimes you'll land on those businesses that are okay, they know I'm like this, and they'll work with me, they'll work with me, you know. And I just had a thought there about that. Um that they'll work, they'll work with me. So and and uh along with that, being a truck driver and having a job or a skill that is marketable, meaning there's a lot of jobs in that area, is good for somebody with ADD, ADHD, or that's neurodiverse. Because if one company, you know, if one company doesn't sorry guys, I got sidetracked. That was a bug down there. Why did I kill it? No, I'm sorry for killing you. Yeah, um being that I have a marketable job, if I get if I get fired from that job or let go from that job because people may not jive, I might may not jive with their culture, there's always a di there's you can always go to a different another job, being that that skill is marketable. And I think I want to push that for people that are neurodiverse, have ADD, ADHD, or are a bit autistic. Find a job that is marketable, like the like trades are come to mind. People need another electrician, people need AC, people need plumbing, people need welding. Tons of truck drivers are out there, which is the profession that I'm in. Um maybe programming, things of that nature, and that has and another thought that comes in my mind too is I'm I'm I'm a Hispanic. Whenever a Hispanic goes into a predominantly, let's say, uh workplace that's not a lot of Hispanics, it'd say it's like a lot of different types of culture people, it's a chat that's another addition to the challenge because you have to be good at it. I'm thinking about like programming or mathematics or engineering, where you go into that field, you gotta be good at it for people to accept you. For you know what I mean? It's it's uh that's what at least that's what I'm thinking right now. I could change my mind. Let me know what you guys think. But, anyways, that's that's that's that there. Um yeah, finding a job that's marketable, going into a career that that has that you can go to different if you get let go from a job because they don't you don't drive with their work culture, meaning they don't necessarily want to work with you because you're neurodiverse, then that's okay. Set aside that job, just chalk it up as an experience, go to another job that that might that's the same, that's has the same skill set. For me, it's truck driving. I've had a bunch of different truck driving jobs. Um, some of them are my fault for getting let go. You know, that's another thing too. When you're ADD, ADHD, you're having to figure out the workplace. And if we've been in school like all the way to like 12th grade, and we've never been in the workplace, we have to figure out the workplace, which is kind of like a school, because you still have you still have people that are the way they are, and we have to learn how to navigate the workplace. And social cues comes in in the workplace too, because a lot of times some some workplaces want you to cut corner, cut corners, and for me, I don't like to cut corners. I like to do it well, do it good, and it and it's there's a huge dynamic in that because people could feel like they're nervous about their job because you're doing a better job than they are. There's this whole dynamic workplace thing that we have to navigate as people with ADD that are neurodiverse or people with ADHD. That's a whole thing in itself that I could talk about in another video. Um, but I hope this helps you guys. If you got any questions, comments, or anything that might be relatable to this or going through the same thing, uh leave it down below. I want you to feel like you can talk about this stuff on my channel uh uh with somebody that's that's like like me. Um but thanks a lot, you guys. It's Susy Ladio Hernandez. Appreciate y'all. Y'all have a good one. Bye.
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