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In social circles, a lot of times I already know I already know when I'm when I'm gonna get rejected. Or when I'm gonna, you know, gonna be put outside of the circle because I'm weird because of the way I am. Uh so and and that's in anything, right? At church, comedy, I'm doing comedy recently uh amongst other musicians, amongst um coding, all these other aspects in my life that I've done, there's always a click, it always clicks. There's always clicks, like people that are socially accepted in social circles that everybody does, everybody likes them, yada yada, whatever. I'm usually the odd the oddball. And I'm done like I mean, I I've been done like trying to be part of those circles. Like I don't need their acceptance, you know what I mean? I don't need the peer pressure, uh the peer pressure of acceptance. Yeah, it bothers me, you know, when I'm when I'm excluded from certain certain certain social circles. But you know, I I gotta keep living my life. I can't let it dictate uh how I continue to live my life. I could, you know, I could be upset about it and um oh excuse me guys, it's early in the morning. Uh I could be upset about it and just let it bother me. But in the past, what I've learned to do is just create my own lane in that particular field, whether it be comedy, music, coding, work, whatever. Um because I I'm being pushed to my own lane anyway. You know what I mean? Why why fight it is how is how I look at it. And the people that rejected you socially when you decide to actually embrace your own lane and do your own thing. Those people they that that that casted you out in the first place, they end up not really jiving with you or not, or you know, liking you and stuff. And you're like, dude, and you know, and and it's it's trip, it's weird because you're like, I thought this is what you wanted. I mean, now there's another level of we really don't want you here, you know, and it's it sucks to be in that position, you know. And sometimes it does get to me. I'm not gonna lie, like I'm just like, damn. It gets to me to the point where I'm like, why does it have to be like this? You know, it sucks. It it just it bothers me. Why do why, why, why? You know, I mean, I always have these why questions. And either sometimes the answer will never the question will never get answered, or you'll figure out why. Like, for instance, like I I know why, because some people, most people in those circles want to be accepted in those circles, so they do what everybody expects them to do. Which you lose your sense of self because you're trying to please others. You know what I mean? How are you gonna expect to get better than the group? You know, all because of this, you know, this one person that may lead the group, oh, you're not supposed to do it like that. Okay, therefore, everybody else doesn't do it like that. Like that's that's that doesn't, you know, that's a compute in my mind because I'm like, dude, don't you want to get better? Like, what's the why you here? You know what I mean? You're just here for the social aspect. I mean, if you're here for the if you're just there for the social aspect, then be there for the social aspect, and that's all you're gonna get. You know, it's you want to get better, you have to learn how to go against the grain and find find other people that are going against the grain as well. Uh and this always brings me back to uh the principle that G, I think it's principle that Jesus teaches being salt and light of the earth. Uh if salt loses its flavor, then then where's the taste? You know, if if you put a light under, you know, if you put something out to cover the light that's on a hill, what it's not gonna be shining, it's not gonna spread, it's not gonna be shining on the hill. So I combine this with my faith in thinking that this is just me being salt and light of the earth. Um and sometimes people are uncomfortable uh with it, they're uncomfortable with me being me. And when I refuse to accept their standards, their social standards, then I'm hated for it. You know what I mean? I'm just I'm I'm known as the the outcast, which is fine. Like I've been doing I've it I've been doing this all my life. Since elementary school, since middle school, since high school, like all my life I've been doing this. You will make fun of me in middle school. I would learn to make fun of myself, you know, just to be like, you know what, okay, I'll beat them to the punch. I'll make fun of myself first before you can make fun of me. Now what are you gonna do? And when I choose my own lane, that's that's how it feels. Like, okay, I picked my own lane. Now what are you gonna do? You know what I mean? And and sometimes I feel like people don't want to get exposed either. So they pretend to be your friend, they'll befriend you. Like, look, I'm your friend, but in actuality, I'm not your friend. You know what I mean? People that are insincere, and being able to discern that and distinguish that. I've learned to do before even getting in social circles, like just listening to what people say, how they carry themselves, how they treat other people, how they how they treat you when other people aren't around, as opposed to how they treat you when other people are around. That's a huge that's a huge sign. Like, oh shoot, you treated me like this when we're when it was just you and I. Now there's a group, now you're treating me like this. That's that's weird. And that goes to say that in order to find those types of things in your life, you need to put yourself out in social situations. Can't always we can't always be scared to go in social situations because of past experiences where we've been rejected or uh been treated badly, things of that nature. Uh which is one of the reasons sometimes I still do it. Like I'd I'd rather do curbside than go into the actual store. You know, one, because I'm lazy, and two, because I really don't want to deal with people because I know how they are, you know. And if you see me walking from a mile away, you already know that I'm a sore thumb. Just because, just I don't know, for some reason that I just that's the R that I give off. And and I've learned to look people straight in the eye, like, look, I'm I see, I know that you you're you're already judging me. I'm gonna look you in the eye and let you know that I'm here. And most times when they try to intimidate you, they look away, they look away like right at the onset. If they're not trying to intimidate you, they're just being normal people, they'll look you in the eye the whole time, and I'll look them in the eye the whole time, and I'll say hello, shake their hand, whatever I gotta do to maintain peace. Uh we got nine minutes right now. I gotta go to work here in a few minutes, you guys. Thanks for listening, for joining. You got comments, leave them down below. Thanks a lot, you guys. I'm Jesus Hernandez. Take it easy. Bye.